To me, there are limited reasons for using the word “sorry” in a blog post.
- When you have made a mistake for which you truly do need to own up and make amends.
- When you are in fact using it to NOT say sorry.
So if you’ll excuse the rant, there’s a trend in blogging that I would love to see go away forever.
Saying sorry for not posting.
Here’s the thing with blogging. If you’re spending more time posting and worrying about writing something every day – for the sake of writing something rather than the enjoyment or quality — you’re not actually living any kind of life that is worth reading about.
Source: skreened.com via Andrea on Pinterest
Truly, I get excited when I see that my favorite bloggers have taken a day off because it means they’re enjoying time with friends, family, pursuing non-blog-related passions, NAPPING or something else. When they come back, I’m usually much more excited to hear about their absence than I would have been to read some half-ass post that was published because “that’s what I do.”
If you don’t have something to say, don’t say anything at all. And be OK with that. Feel at peace. Enjoy your break.
I’m giving myself the same stare-down, so don’t think that I haven’t felt pressure to post every day. For those of us who make money from our blogs, a day without a post is a day without that income. It’s certainly something that plays a role, and I don’t want to be dismissive of that.
But if you do have the chance to step away, or you just need a brain break (this blogging stuff can be hard!), please…do us both a favor. Don’t apologize. If you need to explain where you’ve been, do that. But you don’t owe us any apologies.
That’s my PSA of the day. Back to happier topics tomorrow.
About Katy
Right on, sister! And I’m looking at myself, as well. I tend to blog in streaks…it is a wonderful outlet, but oftimes, real life gets in the way. I think that NOT blogging helps distill what is really important for the next post.
P.S. I will stop bugging you when no blog post shows up in my Google Reader by 7am on any given day!
YES YES YES! I have no qualms about not posting my usual 3x a day when life gets in the way… especially over the weekends, and I don’t apologize for it. I, too, cringe a bit when a blogger apologizes for not posting a ton or missing a usual post. Most of the time readers a.) don’t care or b.) totally understand. If do acknowledge my missed post or unexplained absence, I’ll usually say something like “I missed you guys” rather than “I’m sorry” because sometimes falling off the face of the blogging earth is a great thing. I promised myself when I started blogging that I wouldn’t neglect living my life in favor of blogging. Yes, I have made a commitment to blogging regularly, but if I miss a routine post, it’s not something that eats me up inside. I definitely think consistency in blogging is important, but so is being human.
Oh and I MISS you, Katy!!!
I like the idea of saying “I missed you” instead of “Sorry I’ve been gone.” It’s such a small difference but the change in tone is major.
Also +1 to the “most readers a.) don’t care or b.) totally understand.”
I say “I’m Sorry” about everything and I hate it. Not usually about not posting because I’m pretty consistent with that. But I’m really not responsible for it being cold outside. Come on…what’s wrong with me?!
I so agree! So often I see “sorry I haven’t posted, yada, yada, yada” and my thought is always that the blogger doesn’t need to apologize to anyone for that!
I’ve been guilty of this so thanks for putting it in perspective!
YES. I couldn’t agree more!
AMEN!!
I HATE when bloggers apologize for not posting! I always want to respond and say, “OH AWESOME! NOW I CAN END MY HUNGER STRIKE!” It comes across as very self-important. And like you said, I like when bloggers have lives outside of their social media lives.
Ha! I want to apologize for not posting just so you can say that on RER
Guilty as charged.
AGREED! Have you read Rachel Wilkerson’s Owning it post about “Sorry, I’m not Sorry!”
I also read this great article earlier this week about how women apologize more and use a different language than men. http://www.theatlanticwire.com/national/2010/10/do-women-apologize-too-much/18570/
Sorry forgot to include Rachel’s link http://www.rachelwilkerson.com/2010/08/18/how-to-stop-feeling-guilty/
Gah! and yet again I subconsciously apologized in this post… I WILL be more aware of this
Oh my gosh…YES! When I read an opening line that says “sorry for not posting…” I immediately close the post b/c it irks me so much. So glad you said this! I’ve never found a way to say it eloquently without sounding like a complete bitch but the truth is, no one really cares *that* much that you didn’t post, don’t feel sorry about! You don’t owe an apology or explanation to anyone!
I completely agree! People are not sitting around waiting for you to post, so stop saying sorry!! So glad you posted on this
AMEN! I try to preach this all the time. I even wrote a post about how I was sorry I am not sorry…I don’t know if that goes against your rule, but you get the gist of it
I definitely do not say Im sorry. I usually post why I wont be posting for a few days and tell my readers to stay tuned and when I will be back.
boom. yes. i see your pet peeve and raise you 11 more: http://www.sweettaterblog.com/2012/01/16/12-blogger-bad-habits/
(you could add “spamming your own posts in someone else’s comments section” to my list, too. whoops!)
This is such a pet peeve of mine too. Good post!
Good attitude! There’s nothing saying you have to post everyday…it’s part of the reason I have only been having posts every 3 days. It gives time to “live” and to make food without having to blog about ALL of it.
I have always wondered why people feel the need to apologize for not posting…on their own blog…why does it matter they didn’t post yesterday?
I don’t feel like bloggers owe it to their readers to blog any more than they want to. It’s so silly to think that their readers are hanging around, waiting for them to post. I honestly hardly pay attention to the amount of times someone is posting, unless a person is blowing up my blog feed daily.
I also agree that blogging for the sake of blogging is ridiculous and oftentimes you end up with a post that is very lacking in content that is a waste of time to read anyways. You are doing your readers a favor to NOT post when you have nothing to say!
Thanks for sharing this in a nice way!
I love you.
What a well needed and well said post! Thank you!!
<3 <3 I said this SAME thing to Michelle about 6 months ago. I hate when bloggers explain why they were gone and apologize for it. So what! No one missed you because you didn't post once. In fact, we appreciate the break because we read a lot of other blogs too.
I prefer once a day or once every other day bloggers. Once you get into the 2x and 3x a day post, it's too much for me to keep up with. And usually that 2nd or 3rd post is just telling me why you loved your overnight oats, which I don't give a sh!t about.
But I don't have any strong feelings about this or anything.
This is one of my pet peeves too! Especially because it makes me feel like they think I’m just sitting at my computer refreshing their blog page until a new blog shows up. It’s cool, I get it, we all have lives. Go live it!
There were a few bloggers I followed that would start every post with the “I’m sorry it’s been so long” and eventually they just stopped posting. And that’s ok! Blogging shouldn’t be a chore and nothing says a blog has to go on forever. Taking a break is good!
Hi Katy …. great subject! Really.
Finally someone is thinking like moi! Bloggers or non …. does not matter.
Rarely to I ever say what the topic is. Not necessary. One of my BFF is the only person who will hear (IS) from my lips. If I screw up really icky …. for me to utter IS would be the correct thing to do.
I continually drill it into my niece’s keppala ….. “curb your IS lady.” She continually says it ….. to everyone ….. for anything. Duhniece. If the girl sneezes or coughs even. I don’t get it.
This odd behavior is absolutely frustrating (and boring) because she doesn’t realize or mean what she is even saying. An ongoing, habitual verse in her little 21 yo brain.
Thanks for covering this important topic Katy. Most likely it will hit home for many. I must admit this would mostly be a female issue.
I was going to say I’m sorry for my rant ….. but, I won’t. So, forget it.
Amen!
Realizing that I didn’t have to post every day…or even stick to my 4x a week posting schedule…was one of the most freeing things I ever did for my blogging. I hate writing posts for the sake of writing posts–it’s just too hard! Now if I have nothing to say, I stay quiet and find something else to do with my time.
Thank you! I’m currently taking a little bloggy break – I have nothing to say and life is a gong show, so I needed time off! I posted a short message on one blog stating I’d be back, on the other, I’m posting as the mood strikes me…. and I won’t be saying “sorry”!
I hope I haven’t said it like that, but I know I have referenced the “not blogging thing” however for me what makes me upset is not that I did not blog due to A, B, or C .. it is more that I notice that after I post regularly my readership goes up and I do not like when I have to build it back up … thank you for posting this though … I will be sure not to apologize for not writing …
Fantastic post, Katy. I couldn’t agree more! I used to say “I’m sorry” all the time and then realized that I should never apologize for living an “offline” life. The Internet is not going anywhere anytime soon, but time is flying by faster than ever! I cherish the relationships I have through blogging but I also know that sometimes I can’t possibly fit it all in. Heck, there are nights where I’d much rather catch up on what other people have to say than try to force something out myself (like tonight, for instance). Thanks for the great post!
Fantastic post! Yes! No need to apologize because you are taking time off to be in LIFE. I know it can be challenging if we are so used to getting connected and sharing. It has taken me sometime to get the hang of it. Now I have created an editorial schedule of what I am posting and when just for ease of mind. It allows me to live life and have a fun blog
Word. You are so right. Luckily, I never set out to be a blogger who posts daily. That certainly helps. Sometimes life needs to happen more than a lame blog post.
Yes. Yes. Yes. I have wondered to myself about 1000 times why people who post three times a day apologize because they “missed their evening post”! Don’t get me wrong. I wouldn’t read these blogs if I didn’t enjoy them, but WHY in the world are you apologizing? It isn’t like anyone’s life was altered because you didn’t post. And most likely, if you didn’t bring it up, I wouldn’t have even noticed!!! Anyway, enough of my rant, but I absolutely 100% agree with this and I hope lots of other bloggers out there read this and take note!